tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3213119742840398822024-03-08T07:48:19.226-05:00On The PremisesA blog we no longer update about writing, editing, and fiction publishing from the people who bring you "On The Premises" magazine.Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.comBlogger51125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-26298265365113383932013-03-03T09:24:00.003-05:002013-03-03T09:25:15.783-05:00Worldbuilding part 2<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Last time, I talked about <span style="font-size: large;">worldbuilding</span> techniques<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">. Those are t</span>he ways </span>authors build a world in the readers' minds--the world the characters live in. Every story requires worldbuilding, even if your story is set in an environment your readers know well.</span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The mistake a lot of unpublished authors make in worldbuilding is the "information dump." I don't know who invented that term, but it's the mistake of providing much more information than the story needs, especially to an audience who doesn't yet have reason to care about any of it.</span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">My theory is, you can get away with any amount of exposition if the reader wants to read it. The trick is to make them want to read it. So whenever you're building your story's world, and you, through exposition, start telling readers all about the last five hundred years of chaos your world has gone through, please hesitate and ask yourself one question:</span></span><br />
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</span> <i><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Why would my readers care about any of this?</span></span></i><br />
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</span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">This question is not rhetorical<span style="font-size: large;">;</span> it's essential. If you can provide a good, solid answer, keep writing that exposition! But if you can't...</span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Oh. Here's a bad answer to that question: "Because if they don't have this information, they'll never understand the implied threat of murder Vanessa's making in Chapter Six when she looks behind the mirror and talks about ghosts." The only time this answer is good, is if you're writing Chapter Six, and Vanessa just now looked behind the mirror and talked about ghosts. </span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">What many beginning fiction writers don't get is, you <i>don't want</i> your reader to understand everything right away. Questions, remember? You want to raise questions in your readers' minds because questions make readers keep reading. If Vanessa's combination mirror move/ghost talk seems really out of place, readers are going to suspect they can't take her action at face value. That's when you tell the readers what her actions mean--right when they want to know the most. Or maybe in the very next scene, if stopping the action for an explanation would wreck the story's rhythm. But soon. Do it soon, or the reader will put stop reading and say "Nothing in this story makes any sense."</span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">One other worldbuilding hint. I promised you a preview of one of the stories we're publishing in Issue #19. The story is our third place winner, <i>The Gear Master's Wife</i>, and we think it contains some of the best worldbuilding our magazine has ever received. The author, John Burridge, manages to mix questions with suggested answers in such a way that, even though we don't fully understand the world the story takes place in, we feel we understand enough. I want to draw special attention to one sentence in that story. The main character makes ice sculptures, and is making sculptures with religious meaning for his city's big holiday. Here's the sentence:</span></span><br />
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</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;">The next morning, the Guild of Bakers came to collect his ice statues for the Longnight Folly.</span></span><br />
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</span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">What kind of world names their biggest holiday "Longnight Folly"? The answer is, this story's world, which is cold, austere, and formal. So does everyone act stupid and foolish for a night on this holiday? No, it's a serious religious holiday. Yet in the context of the story, it works... even though you never really understand what the holiday's about or why it matters so. </span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">So why would a guild of bakers come by to pick up the ice sculptures? I have no idea, but I bet the author does, and his confidence shines through in every description. </span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">See, the story isn't really about the holiday or the guild of bakers. That's all background. The story is about a man who just suffered a terrible loss. The important thing is, he suffered it in this story's world, which is so stark and formal that readers can intuit the sculptor isn't going to get much help for his pain. This story's world doesn't have a lot of use for clumsy, awkward feelings. So, people in this world have a real problem when they're overcome with emotions too strong to contain. Since an act like crying or getting roaring drunk would be unthinkable here, the man's feelings escape him in a rather unorthodox way that causes a lot of trouble, and that is what the story is really about. </span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">E</span>very description and every action characters take hammer home the world's formality. Who cares why bakers collect the ice statues? It's interesting--it makes the world seem more real, because somebody (the author) put a lot of thought into that choice--but it's not important. What's important is what's shown in every line, and demonstrated in every description: this is not a place where you'll get comforted when you're sad.</span></span><br />
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</span></span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">So when you're building your characters' world, figure out what its most important element is, and focus on that. In <i>The Zen Thing</i>, the story I discussed last time, it was the bizarre relationships among deeply flawed people. In <i>The Gear Master's Wife</i> it's the world's coldness. What is it in your story's world? </span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-9920908551128348962013-02-24T09:09:00.004-05:002013-02-24T09:09:40.639-05:00Worldbuilding<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The term "Worldbuilding" dates <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Worldbuilding">at least back to the 1970s</a> and refers to the work involved in creating a fictional world. When referring to prose ficiton, worldbuilding is all about giving fictional characters an interesting (to the reader, anyway) place to live. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">(Remember, the world has to be interesting to the <i>reader</i>, not necessarily to the story's characters. The purpose of writing fiction is to make <i>readers</i>, not characters, experience specific thoughts and feelings.)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Stories that are set in the real world require just as much worldbuilding as stories set <span style="font-size: large;">in galaxies far, far away</span>. The difference is, readers can <i>generally</i> be assumed to have a basic knowledge of the real world. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">That's not always true, though. At OTP we get a fair number of submissions from countries where life is rather different than it is in the US, or even the US and the UK and its related countries. For issue #19 we received, liked, but ultimately had to reject a story that couldn't be fully appreciated unless you knew a lot more about Serbian history than we do<span style="font-size: large;">, and t<span style="font-size: large;">hat <span style="font-size: large;">we <span style="font-size: large;">suspect our readers have.</span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">A couple of times we've published stor<span style="font-size: large;">ies by African authors, and</span> we've had to ask them to be a little more explicit about what certain objects are, or whether it's going with custom or against custom for a character to do some<span style="font-size: large;"> act that, in<span style="font-size: large;"> the story, annoys neighbors</span></span>. I'm sure some African readers probably wondered why the author bothered explaining something "everybody knows," but the point is, OTP is a global magazine and there's very little in this world that "everybody knows." (For one thing, all of our stories are written in English and only <a href="http://exploredia.com/how-many-people-in-the-world-speak-english-2013/">about 1/8 of the world's population can speak English</a>. Reading it is a different question, and even harder to <span style="font-size: large;">answer</span>.) </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Even stories set in today's America and aimed at educated audiences in today's America require worldbuilding. Here's a<span style="font-size: large;"> good example from <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">"The Zen Thing" </span>by Emma Duffy, <span style="font-size: large;">recent<span style="font-size: large;">ly published in <i>One Story</i> magazine<span style="font-size: large;">. Wat<span style="font-size: large;">ch this combination of family hi<span style="font-size: large;">story, c<span style="font-size: large;">haracteriza<span style="font-size: large;">tion, moo<span style="font-size: large;">d sett<span style="font-size: large;">ing, and scene setting<span style="font-size: large;">. Anita is the story's main character<span style="font-size: large;"> and the setting is a <span style="font-size: large;">family get-together.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">[Frank] and Ani<span style="font-size: large;">t<span style="font-size: large;">a's gra<span style="font-size: large;">ndmother ar<span style="font-size: large;">e eighty years old<span style="font-size: large;">. <span style="font-size: large;">They met five years ago at Fresh Seafood, wh<span style="font-size: large;">ere Anita's grandmot<span style="font-size: large;">her worked as a cashier. They were both l<span style="font-size: large;">iving in mobile homes at the time, but Frank's <span style="font-size: large;">was a <span style="font-size: large;">double-w<span style="font-size: large;">ide, and so they decided to move in there. E<span style="font-size: large;">veryone is glad</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>for it, especially Frank, who seems to have no family to his <span style="font-size: large;">name whatsoever and will now, he knows, have his ass wiped by Anita's parents when the time comes. He has alr<span style="font-size: large;">eady asked Anita'<span style="font-size: large;">s mother, who is a nurse, to be his medical power of attorney. Everyone is pretty sure Frank is gay, and possibly black, though Anita's grandmother, having never had <span style="font-size: large;">any experience with either, is unaware of this.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">That's<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> 100% worldbuilding. You can't understand this story until you under<span style="font-size: large;">stand the fami<span style="font-size: large;">ly and the world they'<span style="font-size: large;">re living in<span style="font-size: large;">. <span style="font-size: large;">In this case their world </span></span><span style="font-size: large;">is <span style="font-size: large;">one of <span style="font-size: large;">unrealistic hopes, long-smoldering grudges<span style="font-size: large;">, and nasty in<span style="font-size: large;">trus<span style="font-size: large;">ions from the uglier parts of reality <span style="font-size: large;">t</span>he characters <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">intend to <span style="font-size: large;">ignore for <span style="font-size: large;">as long as possible</span>.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Worldbuilding is much more difficult, though, when a story is not set in<span style="font-size: large;"> a world that shares most of its fea<span style="font-size: large;">tures with the <span style="font-size: large;">one the au<span style="font-size: large;">dience lives in.<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">When I was ac<span style="font-size: large;">tive on <i>critters.org</i>, I read a lot of unpublished (an<span style="font-size: large;">d unpub<span style="font-size: large;">lishable<span style="font-size: large;">) <span style="font-size: large;">SF/fantasy novels, or at least their opening chapters. I've seen authors <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">desperately tr<span style="font-size: large;">y to stuff six books' worth of notes about th<span style="font-size: large;">eir wor<span style="font-size: large;">ld's history <span style="font-size: large;">into the reader without once asking the question, "What <i><span style="font-size: large;">must</span></i><span style="font-size: large;"> the reader<span style="font-size: large;"> know to <span style="font-size: large;">fully understand my story?" The answer to <span style="font-size: large;">that question is<span style="font-size: large;">,</span> <span style="font-size: large;">"Much, much less than <span style="font-size: large;">what you need to know to <i>write</i> your story."</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">In other words, we can read and enjoy <i>The Hobbit</i> without having to read <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Silmarillion"><i><span style="font-size: large;">The Silmarillion</span></i></a><span style="font-size: large;">. (Good thing, too<span style="font-size: large;">, if you ask me!</span></span>) <span style="font-size: large;">That's because the best writers figure out how to imply or suggest what <span style="font-size: large;">readers</span> <span style="font-size: large;">need to grasp about a world<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">witho<span style="font-size: large;">ut having to write "information dumps"<span style="font-size: large;">--those heavy, leaden walls of text t<span style="font-size: large;">hat <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">previously speedy and nimble stories crash into and die<span style="font-size: large;"> from.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">As an example, in th<span style="font-size: large;">e <span style="font-size: large;">excerpt above, read<span style="font-size: large;">ers <span style="font-size: large;">could not be expected to g<span style="font-size: large;">uess that Anita's grand<span style="font-size: large;">mother ha<span style="font-size: large;">s had no experience with gay<span style="font-size: large;">s or black people, so the story told them. <span style="font-size: large;">Readers also couldn't be expected to guess that Frank <span style="font-size: large;">may well be both gay and black, so the stor<span style="font-size: large;">y</span> told them. But now that you know <span style="font-size: large;">these two things, and that Ani<span style="font-size: large;">ta's grandmother and Frank have been <span style="font-size: large;">living together for five ye<span style="font-size: large;">ars, </span></span></span>what <i>can</i> you guess? See, that's the art of worldbuilding--giving the readers just enough pieces of the puzzle for <span style="font-size: large;">them to assemble the rest<span style="font-size: large;">. <span style="font-size: large;">T</span>he finished p<span style="font-size: large;">icture in the reader's mind doe<span style="font-size: large;">sn't have to be exactly the same as the one in the writer's mind, just close enough <span style="font-size: large;">to provide a useful framework for the rest of the<span style="font-size: large;"> story. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Next week I'll give you a pr<span style="font-size: large;">eview of a story we're publishing in <span style="font-size: large;">Issue #19. That story does one of the best jobs of SF worldbuilding I<span style="font-size: large;">'ve ever seen from an author who i<span style="font-size: large;">sn't alre<span style="font-size: large;">ady </span></span></span>famous for writing great SF<span style="font-size: large;">, and I'll go <span style="font-size: large;">into some detail <span style="font-size: large;">(with the author's permission<span style="font-size: large;">) about how I think he does it.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-35420887959091634522013-02-03T11:09:00.001-05:002013-02-03T11:10:14.643-05:00Our Reading and Rating Process<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Every once in a while, we get communications from people who don't understand how we can announce the results of a short story contest just t<span style="font-size: large;">wo <span style="font-size: large;">or three days after it closes. <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">They wonder if we're somehow reading 200<span style="font-size: large;">+ st<span style="font-size: large;">ories in two or three days. No, we rea<span style="font-size: large;">d and rate them as they come in. But that <span style="font-size: large;">raises a<span style="font-size: large;">n important question:</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> <br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">I<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">f you send us a story ten days into a conte<span style="font-size: large;">st and we judge it to be the 12th best story o<span style="font-size: large;">f the 20 received up to that point, why do<span style="font-size: large;">n't we send you a rejection slip<span style="font-size: large;"> right then? Why wait until the contest is over?</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">We're open to changing that practice,<span style="font-size: large;"> if you can come up with a strong<span style="font-size: large;"> enough counter-argument. <span style="font-size: large;">Here is <span style="font-size: large;">our reasoning<span style="font-size: large;"> for the current practice.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">1) We want each author to en<span style="font-size: large;">ter our contests only once. <span style="font-size: large;">Sin<span style="font-size: large;">ce we read all stories blindly, however, w</span></span>e don't<span style="font-size: large;"> have a good way to <span style="font-size: large;">prevent s</span></span>omebody from sending us a story on Day 1 of the contest, and then s<span style="font-size: large;">ubmitting something else on Day 75. <span style="font-size: large;">Our nightmare scenario is dea<span style="font-size: large;">ling wit<span style="font-size: large;">h a <span style="font-size: large;">writer who would submit <span style="font-size: large;">a different <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">(rejectable</span>) story every day if we <span style="font-size: large;">rejected stories as soon as <span style="font-size: large;">we realize<span style="font-size: large;">d they had no chance to get publishe<span style="font-size: large;">d. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">2) A point from Beth<span style="font-size: large;">any: <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">We <span style="font-size: large;">have rejected stories that turned out to<span style="font-size: large;"> be </span>from authors who<span style="font-size: large;">, in different contests, took f<span style="font-size: large;">irst place<span style="font-size: large;"> (with <span style="font-size: large;">a different story of course). <span style="font-size: large;">By rejecting an early entry right away, we're giving that entry<span style="font-size: large;">'s </span>author a chance to <span style="font-size: large;">submit a different story that we might like a lot more.<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">Rejecting stories right <span style="font-size: large;">aw<span style="font-size: large;">ay gives<span style="font-size: large;"> those <span style="font-size: large;">stories' authors</span></span> a big advantage over other <span style="font-size: large;">contestants, <span style="font-size: large;">and we th<span style="font-size: large;">ink that<span style="font-size: large;"> wou<span style="font-size: large;">ld be unfair.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> <br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">3</span>) I know from experi<span style="font-size: large;">ence it's annoy<span style="font-size: large;">ing to wait 2-3 months <span style="font-size: large;">to f<span style="font-size: large;">i<span style="font-size: large;">nd out how your story did, but<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> a </span>2<span style="font-size: large;">-3 month wait time is not that far from an <span style="font-size: large;">industry average. So while I<span style="font-size: large;">'m not t<span style="font-size: large;">hrilled with it, I don't feel we're trea<span style="font-size: large;">ting our writers in a way that the industry would condemn.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">4</span>) <span style="font-size: large;">What would we do with a story <span style="font-size: large;">we <span style="font-size: large;">rec<span style="font-size: large;">eive on <span style="font-size: large;">Day <span style="font-size: large;">2 of a contest, and is so good, i<span style="font-size: large;">t</span> remains in contention all the way to the <span style="font-size: large;">end, <span style="font-size: large;">but on the last day we decide <span style="font-size: large;">it can't quite crack the top ten? That <span style="font-size: large;">author's <span style="font-size: large;">going <span style="font-size: large;">to wait three months for a reply no matter what.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">5) Another point from Be<span style="font-size: large;">thany: <span style="font-size: large;">Just about every contest, at least one author withdraws his or her entry for some reason.<span style="font-size: large;"> We'v<span style="font-size: large;">e had that hap<span style="font-size: large;">p<span style="font-size: large;">en just before a <span style="font-size: large;">contes<span style="font-size: large;">t closed! In fac<span style="font-size: large;">t, <span style="font-size: large;">twice now it's happen<span style="font-size: large;">ed with stories we were strongly considering sending to the prize judges. <span style="font-size: large;">That mean<span style="font-size: large;">t some story we <span style="font-size: large;">were originally going to reject too<span style="font-size: large;">k the withdrawn<span style="font-size: large;"> story's place</span></span>, <span style="font-size: large;">and in at least on<span style="font-size: large;">e case,<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> won a prize</span>. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> <br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">6</span>) Final<span style="font-size: large;">ly, eve<span style="font-size: large;">ry<span style="font-size: large;"> al<span style="font-size: large;">ternative we've considered sounds worse to us than the current practice. We've even considered a "halfway" notice<span style="font-size: large;">, <span style="font-size: large;">in which ha<span style="font-size: large;">lfway through a contest, we'd tell all non-c<span style="font-size: large;">ontending authors that they didn't make it. But what wou<span style="font-size: large;">ld we do with the contending authors, if anything? <span style="font-size: large;">I don't want to get their h<span style="font-size: large;">opes up because many times, a story that is in the top <span style="font-size: large;">ten half<span style="font-size: large;">way through a contest doesn't ma<span style="font-size: large;">ke the <span style="font-size: large;">final round. (Two-thirds of our entries <span style="font-size: large;">tend to come in the last half of the contest.) Plus there's still the<span style="font-size: large;"> one<span style="font-size: large;">-entry-per-author problem.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">It seems like the only way to <span style="font-size: large;">give feedback in something <span style="font-size: large;">closer to real t<span style="font-size: large;">ime <span style="font-size: large;">would be to pick on the authors who sen<span style="font-size: large;">t the stories that did the worst. We don't want to do that. So, we <span style="font-size: large;">file our notes and de<span style="font-size: large;">cisions away and ho<span style="font-size: large;">ld<span style="font-size: large;"> them until the end.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Having said all that, <span style="font-size: large;">if y<span style="font-size: large;">ou can <span style="font-size: large;">make an <span style="font-size: large;">argument for <span style="font-size: large;">faster r<span style="font-size: large;">ejections <span style="font-size: large;">that's s<span style="font-size: large;">tronger than <span style="font-size: large;">the a<span style="font-size: large;">rg<span style="font-size: large;">ument for our current system, please <span style="font-size: large;">do, and we'll thin<span style="font-size: large;">k about c<span style="font-size: large;">hanging. Over th<span style="font-size: large;">e years, we've adjusted <span style="font-size: large;">a number of our practices <span style="font-size: large;">because our readers and writers had better ideas than we<span style="font-size: large;"> did. We're willing to do so again.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-57376368184245047832013-01-20T11:00:00.002-05:002013-01-20T11:01:27.844-05:00James Wood's "How Fiction Works"<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">For about two years, I've been trying to figure out whether to recommend James Wood's <a href="http://www.amazon.com/How-Fiction-Works-James-Wood/dp/0312428472/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1358694479&sr=8-1&keywords=How+Fiction+Works"><i>How Fiction Works</i></a> to OTP readers. I just finished reading it for the fourth time, so you'd think this decision would be easy. My problem is, I want to help beginning to intermediate writers improve their fiction writing skills and their ability to sell short stories, and I'm not convinced Wood's book does that. In fact, I'm pretty sure it doesn't. But then I remember I've read it four times now and will probably read it four more times in the future, so there's got to be something valuable in there.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">In <i>How Fiction Works</i>, Wood dissects fiction at a theoretical level to discuss why a bunch of words can evoke such thoughts and feelings in readers, and how subtly those words can work on our psyche. He spends most of the book talking about what he calls the "free indirect" style of narration in which how objects and events are described relate to the way characters in a story view the world. To me, that's obvious, but since I'm not a literature major, I didn't realize the extent to which older fiction was designed differently.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">When you read extremely old fiction, such as Homer and stories from the Bible, the differences become obvious. These stories were written in a style that never once attempts to show the fictional world through the eyes of any character. The stories are most definitely told to the reader, and the reader is entirely outside of them. As Wood says, detail is never "gratuitous" and meant to convey a realistic sense of place, and the oldest storytellers "seem to feel no pressure to evoke a life-like passing of [time]" (p. 87). Here's an example Wood uses, which is taken from the Bible:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">"And Abraham rose up early in the morning, and saddled his ass, and took two of his young men with him, and Isaac his son, and clave the wood for the burnt offering, and rose up, and went unto the place of which God had told him. Then on the third day Abraham lifted up his eyes, and saw the place afar off." (Genesis 22:3)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">First, we would today call this kind of writing "summary," as opposed to its opposite, "scene." (We'd also wonder why Abraham "rose off" twice. Wasn't he already up after the first time?) Second, you don't feel like you're right there with Abraham while he's rising up and rising up again. You feel like you're being told about something that happened a long time ago that had nothing to do with you. Compare that to any modern writing, which generally attempts to make you feel the way the characters feel, and to get you right inside their heads. Modern fiction is designed to make you feel wind rush over your skin, as opposed to just telling you "And on that day the wind blew mightily" or something.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Most of all, though, Wood talks about the tension between authorial narration and characters' viewpoints. Many times I've wondered if it's possible to write a story from a child's perspective <i>realistically</i>. Have you ever heard a five-year-old try to tell a story? "Yesterday, I was at school, and someone brought a bunny. A bunny, it was a bunny. There was a bunny and it was white and brown and it knocked over the juice." Do you really want to read a whole story told that way? I've seen some pretty good attempts, but five-year-olds aren't known for their wise editorial decisions about what details to put where, and when to let key information enter the picture. Yet serious fiction writers need to think about such things.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Wood's book intrigues me because he spends a lot of time talking about the problems inherent in trying to write both realistically, and through the eyes and style of characters who would make lousy writers. When is it okay for an authors to insert their own opinions into the prose? Or as Wood asks, "Can we reconcile the author's perceptions and language with the character's perception and language?" Wood's answer is "yes," and he spends most of the book talking about how great writers have done it, especially the French writer Gustave Flaubert, who pretty much invented our modern answer to that question and who influenced virtually every fiction writer after him from James Kafka to Stephanie Meyer, whether the writers realize it or not.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">So if you're interested in a deep analysis of the mechanics of writing, I think <i>How Fiction Works</i> is for you. If you'd rather figure out why your plots or dialogue never come out the way you want, or why editors keep telling you your stories are too long/too short/too something else, you need a different book.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-91390926374057516242012-12-23T13:37:00.003-05:002012-12-23T13:39:10.243-05:00It's Okay to Tell, if You Do It Well<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I get nervous when I see someone use the writing cliche "Show, don't tell." I get nervous because it's the kind of advice that's useful to beginning fiction writers at a certain point in their development, and after that point, I think it's limiting at best, and harmful at worst. <br /><br />Think of the advice to "get plenty of exercise." I don't think many people would hear "get plenty of exercise" and assume they<span style="font-size: large;"> should never</span> sleep,<span style="font-size: large;"> si<span style="font-size: large;">nc</span></span>e sleeping is the opposite of exercising. Yet when I participated in on-line critique forums and when I listen to developing writers critique each other, I notice people saying "show, don't tell" as if they really believe prose is never supposed to tell.<br /><br />"Show, don't tell" really means "Use behavioral examples, don't simply state facts." It means "make your characters do things that demonstrate the point you, the author, want to make." <br /><br />So instead of writing "Pat was an alcoholic," write "Pat started the day with a glass of vodka and finished it with several more" or something. We'll all agree the second example is more evocative than the first. But if you take "show, don't tell" to heart, all you'll ever do is describe people's actions. You'll never once step inside their head and let us know what they're thinking or feeling, because that would require telling. (And that's fine if you're trying to out-Hemingway Hemingway, but<span style="font-size: large;"> he used telling plenty of times</span>. From <i>A Farewell To Arms</i>: "The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills." That's as telling as telling gets.)<br /> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Internal narration is one of the most powerful techniques a fiction writer can use, and it's a form of telling. In fact, it's a technique<span style="font-size: large;"> </span>only available to prose writers. Movies can't do it, at least not without voice-overs. Plays can't do it. Movies and plays <span style="font-size: large;">rea<span style="font-size: large;">lly do need to show, not tell, because movies with long stretches of<span style="font-size: large;"> a character telling things is difficult to sit through,<span style="font-size: large;"> even when done well.</span></span></span></span></span></span> That's why it's very difficult, in a mov<span style="font-size: large;">ie </span>or play <span style="font-size: large;">(especially a play)</span>, to get across certain basic facts about characters, like their birthday, without using carefully staged tricks, such as showing a calendar while showing someone celebrating with a birthday cake. Or, of course, by having a character TELL the audience, in dialogue, "Isn't it your birthday today? It's December 23, right?" (A<span style="font-size: large;">nd if the response is, "<span style="font-size: large;">No, that was your first husband--mine's in <span style="font-size: large;">May<span style="font-size: large;">,<span style="font-size: large;">" now the audience has been told and shown the <span style="font-size: large;">first speaker used to be married to someone else<span style="font-size: large;">.)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br /><br />Great fiction writers "tell" all the time, because <i>when done well</i>, prose can get complex layers of information across better and faster than any other storytelling medium. Here are three examples of good telling from three award-winning short stories published in the last two years.<br /><br /><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">His name was Howard Ritche, and he was only a few years older than she was...</span><br /><br />from <i>Corrie</i> by Alice Munro<br /><br /><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">I always think I can finesse these situations--the last was maybe seven years ago, when I received an award at the college where I teach--but in the event I am clumsy and fall back on false hurry.</span><br /><br />from <i>Things Said or Done</i> by Ann Packer<br /><br /><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Martha filed for divorce. She collected the apartment on Central Park West and a considerable sum of money, then went to counseling. Lovers did not materialize to replace the discarded husband.</span> <br /><br />from <i>Volcano</i> by Lawrence Osborne <br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />Look at the word "discarded" in "discarded husband." The use of that adjective is an example of "telling" that no non-verbal storytelling medium can reproduce. We never even see the husband. A movie, at best, would have to use some kind of montage sequence showing Martha signing divorce papers, still having the apartment (with a shot of a sign saying "Central Park West" so we <span style="font-size: large;">learn the name</span>), getting a check or payment with a number the average audience member would call "considerable," then going to counseling, then being alone in a lot of places that indicate she's looking for romance, then remaining alone in those places as romance happened for everyone around her but not her. That might work, but it would take a while and halfway through the montage we'd guess where the movie was going and be bored with the scene before it finished. Yet "Volcano" accomplishes all of that and more so quickly the reader doesn't have time to be bored, and so evocatively the reader's imagination is activated and fills in everything the story is just suggesting.<br /><br />My point is, there is good telling, and there is bad telling. If you want the best treatment of good vs. bad telling I've ever seen, get <a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Making-Story-Creative-Writing/dp/0393337081/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1356287780&sr=8-1&keywords=the+making+of+a+story"><i>The Making of a Story</i> by Alice LaPlante</a> and study Chapter Five: "Why You Need to Show <i>and</i> Tell." I've backed up some of her points in this entry, but there's no substitute for the line-by-line dissection of long passages from short stories to demonstrate when one technique works better than the other.<br /><br />So I say quit worrying about whether your prose is showing or telling, and worry about whether it's evoking thoughts and feelings in the reader. In the end, fiction is about what the reader thinks and feels. <br /><br /><br /></span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-34746238903240168232012-12-16T13:25:00.001-05:002013-01-20T11:03:03.431-05:00Stories Must Acknowledge Readers' Obvious Questions<span style="font-size: large;">Imagine a story that takes place entirely in a bar, with friends drinking and talking. At one point in the story an empty beer glass fl<span style="font-size: large;">ie</span>s off <span style="font-size: large;">a</span> table (by it<span style="font-size: large;">self) </span>and crashes through a window. Other than telling us the glass does that, the story never mentions the incident again, and no characters pay any attention to it.<br /><br />So now imagine I call the story's author and say the beer glass scene doesn't work for me, because I want to know more about why the glass flew and why no one seemed to notice or care. <br /><br />AUTHOR: I didn't explain the glass because I wanted to show, not tell, that this fictional world looks exactly like the real one but is different in a couple of ways. <br /><br />ME: Okay, you did that. But why didn't anybody react?<br /><br />AUTHOR: Because I wanted to show, not tell, that in this world, people are so used to seeing beer glasses fly around by themselves that they don't even notice it half the time. <br /><br />ME: Would they react the same way if a vodka bottle flew around?<br /><br />AUTHOR: Oh no. [Explains why beer glasses are the only objects that fly around.]<br /><br />ME: That explanation makes sense. Here's the problem. I had to call you in order to learn it, and learning it makes me appreciate your story and your story's world a lot more than I did before. <span style="font-size: large;">Y</span>our story has to give readers, in its text, the same appreciation you just gave me<span style="font-size: large;"> over <span style="font-size: large;">the phone.</span></span><br /><br />AUTHOR: But I don't want to interrupt my story for a three-page information dump.<br /><br />ME: I don't want that either.<span style="font-size: large;"> </span>I want you to acknowledge that readers are going to wonder why the beer glass moves on its own, and address that question<span style="font-size: large;"> in the story.</span><br /><br />AUTHOR: There's no way to do that without the story being artificial. No character in this world would bother mentioning a flying beer glass. It would be like a character in the real world going outside in the rain and saying "Hey, look at this water falling from the sky," then explaining what weather is and what water is. <br /><br />ME: What you described is the worst way to handle the problem. On the other hand, if your rain story's audience lived in a world where water had never fallen from the sky, you<span style="font-size: large;"> <i>would</i></span> have to address rain for that audience the same way I'm asking you to address the beer glass. <br /><br />At this point, if the author were still reluctant to explain the flying glass, I'd ask the author to reconsider having one in the story at all. If this fictional world has flying beer glasses then it probably has other strange departures from the real world too, yet those aren't in the story. So why put in something that will just end up annoying the reader?<br /><br />Here are two approaches to solving the problem.<br /><br />1) A character says, "I hate when that happens. At least this one wasn't full." The next character says, "Do you complain about everything that happens every day? What are you going to yell at next, the sun for setting every night?" Or maybe, "That's what you get for not chaining it to the table," and have the character dangle the unused chain at whoever complained.<br /><br />You could argue this conversion is a bit artificial. I'd argue all stories are, and must be, artificial, but that's another post. If you don't like the dialogue solution, try this one:<br /><br />2) [Narration:] Most bars had switched to paper or <span style="font-size: large;">S</span>tyrofoam cups to avoid the problem of flying beer glasses, but the Redrum Bar's owner thought the danger added atmosphere. He couldn't have been too wrong; the bar was packed every night.<br /><br />You could argue the second approach is no good because it tells instead of shows, but I'm going to argue against that idea in my next post, next week. The p<span style="font-size: large;">oint is, if readers are obviously going to wonder about somethi<span style="font-size: large;">ng in your story, you<span style="font-size: large;">'re ob<span style="font-size: large;">ligated to at lea<span style="font-size: large;">st</span> ac<span style="font-size: large;">kno<span style="font-size: large;">w<span style="font-size: large;">ledge the que<span style="font-size: large;">stion. Whether you answer it is up to you.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-51869782401144528222012-11-25T09:03:00.001-05:002013-01-20T11:02:19.256-05:00What makes a good story?<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">A professional colleague of mine, K. Stoddard Hayes, wondered on Facebook what my opinion was about literary vs. genre stories. Specifically she asked for my opinion on the discussion about whether a story can be good "only if it is well crafted on every level from grammar to themes" or "because people enjoy it regardless of any traditional literary standards of merit?"<br />
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It just so happens that before I launched On The Premises, my co-publisher and I worked long and hard to figure a way to rate the quality of short stories. We didn't want our winners to be chosen based solely on subjective criteria. We didn't want to hand people money and say<span style="font-size: large;">,</span> "I don't know why we liked that other story better, but we did so you come in second." That's one reason we rely on multiple raters: inter-rater reliability (how much judges agree) is one of our scoring criteria. It helps that I'm a professional measurement expert whose day job includes being paid to invent ways to measure non-physical <span style="font-size: large;">aspects of life</span>. (How do you usefully measure <span style="font-size: large;">the</span> "friendliness" of a customer <span style="font-size: large;">environment</span>? It can be done!)<br />
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Our first step was to "operationalize," as we social scientists say. In this case, that meant changing the question from "What is a good story?" to a pair of more easily answered questions: "What does a good story do?" and "What does a bad story do?"<br />
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We came up with a list. Here are some excerpts.<br />
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<b>Good story:</b> Makes us want to finish it. When it's over, we want to share it with friends.<br />
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<b>Bad story:</b> Bores us. <br />
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<b>Good story:</b> Either uses standard grammar, spelling, and punctuation so these elements of writing do not distract from the story, OR deliberately uses them in non-standard ways that thoughtfully enhance the story.<br />
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<b>Bad story:</b> Uses non-standard grammar, spelling, and punctuation thoughtlessly, and probably accidentally, and as a result these elements of storytelling interfere with our ability to enjoy the story being told. <br />
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<b>Good story:</b> Has characters that seem like real people to us. We'll remember them long after the story ends.<br />
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<b>Bad story:</b> Has characters so generic and one-dimensional, or so clichéd, that they seem like plot devices, not real people.<br />
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Up to this point, our measurements wouldn't distinguish a decent but ephermeral spy novel from great literature. This next one, though...<br />
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<b>Good story:</b> Uses language artistically. Surprises us with word choices, comparisons, and imagery that evokes feelings and thoughts far beyond what the surface definitions of the words normally would.<br />
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<b>Average story:</b> Uses language plainly but correctly, much like basic journalism is supposed to. All elements of the story being told are clearly understandable, so we are never confused about what is going on, but the language itself evokes no thoughts or feelings in us beyond what we would think and feel if we personally witnessed the events being described. <br />
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<b>Bad story:</b> Uses language poorly. Surprises us with confusing or inaccurate word choices that make us not believe what we're reading. ("The pillow clanked against the bed.") Evokes thoughts and feelings in us that go against the ones the story is trying to create in us. Relies on flat or clichéd descriptions that bore us because we've seen them so often. Uses esoteric or unusual language that detracts from, instead of enhances, the effect the story is trying to produce.<br />
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We had others, but I hope I've illustrated my point. I don't think asking what a good story <i>is</i> is as useful as asking what a good story <i>does</i>. <br />
<br />
So let's return to Hayes's question: can a story be good only if well-crafted at every level, or just because people enjoy it?<br />
<br />
For most readers, enjoyment is enough. I think that's fine. I can't see any point in forcing readers to read something they get absolutely no enjoyment <span style="font-size: large;">from</span>. (Even in high school English class? Yes, even then. Are schools TRYING to make tomorrow's adults hate reading fiction? They seem to be.)<br />
<br />
Publishers who want to sell lots of copies of books probably don't have to evaluate a story much past the "will people enjoy it" question either. Oh, they need to make sure standard (and therefore non-distracting) grammar and punctuation are used, but beyond that, they just want to know if people will stand in line to buy it. <br />
<br />
If you have learned to enjoy language itself, however, you might want more out of a story than just plot and character. Plainly written stories might bore you because there's not enough innovative and elegant writing involved. <br />
<br />
(Some people, in fact, value the writing itself so much more than the story that they actively dislike plot, because plot frequently takes a reader's attention away from the language. Heavily plotted stories, such as nearly all genre writing, are frequently better served by ordinary language than "beautiful writing," which is one reason certain literary types disdain genre writing. These types prefer the form of language over its basic communicative function. They probably also like poetry because poetry is 100% language--no characters or plot required. Writers who disdain characters and story might be happier abandoning prose for poetry so they can concentrate exclusively on language.) <br />
<br />
To me, the best stories excel in all the areas I've mentioned. They contain fully developed and interesting characters in a complex, interesting situation that's written about using language that enhances every effect produced by whatever it describes.<br />
<br />
So to answer your question, K. Hayes, I think a story can be great even if it's just a fun read, and the more enjoyable it is, the better it is. But it can be even better than <i>that</i> if it meets all those "traditional literary standards of merit" as well. </span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-30262582347829334422012-11-11T08:51:00.001-05:002012-11-11T08:51:29.344-05:00Fun with Commas<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">If you ever want to start a fight, follow these steps.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: large;">1) Get a bunch of fiction editors in the same room. (That step alone might be enough, but if you want the sparks to really fly...)</span></span> <br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: large;">2) Give them the text from any outstanding short story published in the last 50 years. Make sure this is a special version of the text, in which all the commas have been deleted.</span></span> <br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: large;">3) Tell them to figure out, as a group, where commas should be placed.</span></span> <br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: large;">It's bad enough that major style guides can't agree on such simple questions as whether </span></span> <br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;">Mary, Tricia, and Alice</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: large;">or</span></span> <br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span style="font-size: large;">Mary, Tricia and Alice</span></span> <br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span> <span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">is the preferred way to list the names of three characters. (The Wikipedia entry about <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serial_comma">that extra comma</a> is the best treatment of the subject I've ever seen.) Yet if you read that entry, you'll notice that it discusses the rules with regard to non-fiction prose. That's probably because in fiction, you can get away with anything if you do it well enough.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">In all prose, a comma's primary purpose is to help a reader<span style="font-size: large;"> organize (and there<span style="font-size: large;">fore </span>understand) </span>text. But in fiction, <span style="font-size: large;">commas</span> ha<span style="font-size: large;">ve</span> a secondary purpose: to slow the prose down by making the reader pause. </span></span><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /> </span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Think about this passage about a 10-year-old girl name<span style="font-size: large;">d Su<span style="font-size: large;">san</span></span>:</span></span> <br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;">Susan, breathless, rattled off all the friends she'd made at summer camp: To<span style="font-size: large;">ni</span> Lisa Kristen Kirsten Debbie Melanie Other Debbie Gwendolyn Sarah a different Susan Beth Barbie (no for real!) Wylie Jamie <span style="font-size: large;">Maria</span>...</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I left out all commas in the example above because I don't want readers to pause; I want them to feel like they're being hit by a firehose. If readers get lost while reading that sentence, good! That's what it would feel like to have a hyper 10-year-old <span style="font-size: large;">tell you</span> all that. If readers follow the first few names then skim the rest and move on to the next sentence of substance, good! That's what most adult listeners would do after the third or fourth name—tune the speaker out and wait for real substance to resume. By taking out the commas, I make reading the text more like hearing "young Susan" speak<span style="font-size: large;">, and instead of<span style="font-size: large;"> feeling like you're reading, you feel like the story is happening t<span style="font-size: large;">o you. (At least I h<span style="font-size: large;">ope you<span style="font-size: large;"> do.)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">In fiction, a comma<span style="font-size: large;">'s </span></span><span style="font-size: large;">secondary purpose can <span style="font-size: large;">conflict with its<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">more universal </span>purpose<span style="font-size: large;">, and that's where the argumen<span style="font-size: large;">ts start. Consider this sentence, and presume it's part of a short story<span style="font-size: large;">:</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">So a</span>fter the pa<span style="font-size: large;">rty we went to Mike's<span style="font-size: large;"> house.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Should that s<span style="font-size: large;">entence have commas? <span style="font-size: large;">If <span style="font-size: large;">so, wh<span style="font-size: large;">ere?</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">My answer is, whe<span style="font-size: large;">rever you want the reader to pause.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">If you want the sentence to <span style="font-size: large;">seem fast, maybe<span style="font-size: large;"> even a bit rushed and poorly organiz<span style="font-size: large;">ed, then leave the commas out. If <span style="font-size: large;">the <span style="font-size: large;">writer doesn't </span></span>want to have that effect on th<span style="font-size: large;">e reader<span style="font-size: large;">—if the writer <span style="font-size: large;">wants the reader to ignore <span style="font-size: large;">p</span>unctuation and <span style="font-size: large;">focus <span style="font-size: large;">on the factual meaning of the words—then<span style="font-size: large;"> I say put them<span style="font-size: large;"> in, b<span style="font-size: large;">ecause readers won't<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">pay much attention to punctuation that does what they're expecting<span style="font-size: large;"></span></span>. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">What if<span style="font-size: large;"> you, the <span style="font-size: large;">editor<span style="font-size: large;">, aren't sure which works better<span style="font-size: large;">, and you don't kn<span style="font-size: large;">ow what the <span style="font-size: large;">writer wants? You can always ask the writer, but you can also examine the surrounding pros<span style="font-size: large;">e</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>.<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span>I<span style="font-size: large;">f th<span style="font-size: large;">at</span> prose is written co<span style="font-size: large;">nventionally, the commas g<span style="font-size: large;">o in. If it is not, and the author is <span style="font-size: large;">breaking traditional rules to a<span style="font-size: large;">chi<span style="font-size: large;">eve a s<span style="font-size: large;">pe<span style="font-size: large;">cific effect, <span style="font-size: large;">I'd proba<span style="font-size: large;">bly </span>leave them ou<span style="font-size: large;">t, even if the <span style="font-size: large;">writer<span style="font-size: large;">'s submitted <span style="font-size: large;">draft <span style="font-size: large;">includes them.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">How do you handle <span style="font-size: large;">problems like this?</span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> <br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"></span> Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-73051731159828521652012-10-28T08:34:00.002-04:002012-10-28T08:34:22.443-04:00Now More Than Ever, Use the Premise Well<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I'll let you folks in on a little secret. W<span style="font-size: large;">hen we<span style="font-size: large;"> l<span style="font-size: large;">aunched our first contest in <span style="font-size: large;">October 2006, we received <span style="font-size: large;">fewer than <span style="font-size: large;">70 <span style="font-size: large;">entr</span>ies. Our <span style="font-size: large;">second </span>contest was based on a premise that was so <span style="font-size: large;">po<span style="font-size: large;">orly d<span style="font-size: large;">esigned </span></span>it turned peop<span style="font-size: large;">le off, and we receive<span style="font-size: large;">d fewer than 40 entries. I<span style="font-size: large;">t wasn't until contest #4, when we<span style="font-size: large;">'d been around for a whole year, that we broke 100 entr<span style="font-size: large;">ies (with 162 of them<span style="font-size: large;">). </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">T</span>he secret <span style="font-size: large;">I'm letting you in on is</span>, the percentage of really good stories was quite small b<span style="font-size: large;">ack then</span>. <span style="font-size: large;">I can remember sending out <span style="font-size: large;">ten stories in the final round <span style="font-size: large;">while <span style="font-size: large;">knowing at least two of them had <span style="font-size: large;">no chan<span style="font-size: large;">ce of publication. <span style="font-size: large;">One time,<span style="font-size: large;"> only ni<span style="font-size: large;">ne stories made the final round.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">That was a long time ago. <span style="font-size: large;">For contest #18, we got at least <span style="font-size: large;">20</span> stories that were better than <span style="font-size: large;">some of the stories that used to make the top <span style="font-size: large;">1<span style="font-size: large;">0<span style="font-size: large;">. We got at least 15 that we'd have been proud to publish in our first year. In fact, the four stories that made the top ten this time, and did <span style="font-size: large;">not get published, would pro<span style="font-size: large;">bably have been published even <i>three</i><span style="font-size: large;"> years ago. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">However, our policy (which we've <span style="font-size: large;">violated only once) is to publish no more th<span style="font-size: large;">an six contest entries: first, secon<span style="font-size: large;">d, third, and up to three hon<span style="font-size: large;">orable mentions. <span style="font-size: large;">We don't plan to change tha<span style="font-size: large;">t. <span style="font-size: large;">Our policy and the gradual rise in <span style="font-size: large;">th<span style="font-size: large;">e quality of our co<span style="font-size: large;">ntest entries have combined toproduce an unexpected effect:</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">How well a st<span style="font-size: large;">ory uses our contest <span style="font-size: large;">premise <span style="font-size: large;">matters a lot more than it used to. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Long ago,<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">a story that<span style="font-size: large;"> was</span> great in every way except use of premise would beat a story that was merely good, but used the premise better. Now judges are com<span style="font-size: large;">paring stories that are great <span style="font-size: large;">in every way <span style="font-size: large;">exc<span style="font-size: large;">ept use of premise against stories that are great in every way <i>including</i> use of premise. Guess which ones win?</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Today I'm sending out the <span style="font-size: large;">fre<span style="font-size: large;">e critiques we'<span style="font-size: large;">re giving to the four runner<span style="font-size: large;">-up stories, and in two of tho<span style="font-size: large;">se cases, mediocre use of th<span style="font-size: large;">e premise is the number one reason th<span style="font-size: large;">ose stor<span style="font-size: large;">ies lost out. One of those stories is one of t<span style="font-size: large;">he best <span style="font-size: large;">written piece<span style="font-size: large;">s we'<span style="font-size: large;">ve ever received. I'd bet some pretty <span style="font-size: large;">decent </span>literary magazines would take it in an instant.<span style="font-size: large;"> Our prize judges turn<span style="font-size: large;">ed it down be<span style="font-size: large;">cause its use of premise was <span style="font-size: large;">too</span> weak<span style="font-size: large;">. In fact, </span>we<span style="font-size: large;"> publishers almost disqualified it <span style="font-size: large;">from t<span style="font-size: large;">he contest for that same reason.<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">But it was <i>so good</i><span style="font-size: large;"> in every other way, we<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">didn't<span style="font-size: large;"> have the h<span style="font-size: large;">eart to DQ it<span style="font-size: large;">. (That'll teach us.<span style="font-size: large;"> It got the lowest sc<span style="font-size: large;">ore of any of the top 10 because <span style="font-size: large;">"time" was <span style="font-size: large;">just barely releva<span style="font-size: large;">nt to it.<span style="font-size: large;"> Next contest, we'll know better.)</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">I hope you folks w<span style="font-size: large;">ill, too. We're called <i>On<span style="font-size: large;"> The Pr<span style="font-size: large;">emises</span></span></i><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> for a reason, and <span style="font-size: large;">that reason matters more than <span style="font-size: large;">ever. Ke<span style="font-size: large;">ep it in mind <span style="font-size: large;">when we launch our nex<span style="font-size: large;">t contest on or around November 10<span style="font-size: large;">.<span style="font-size: large;"> Use the pr<span style="font-size: large;">emise, and use it well!</span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-49882012337944476882012-10-21T09:37:00.000-04:002012-10-21T09:37:00.677-04:00My "Jigsaw Puzzle" theory of fiction writing<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Last time, I said I<span style="font-size: large;">'</span>d tell you about a<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span>techn<span style="font-size: large;">ique I used <span style="font-size: large;">to </span>wr<span style="font-size: large;">ite "<a href="http://www.ufopub.com/2012/09/29/the-ogre-king-and-the-piemaker-by-tarl-kudrick/">The Ogre King and the Pi</a><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.ufopub.com/2012/09/29/the-ogre-king-and-the-piemaker-by-tarl-kudrick/">emaker</a>" in about half the t<span style="font-size: large;">i<span style="font-size: large;">me I normally need for a short story. When I discussed it <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">quite some time ago in the OTP newsletter, <span style="font-size: large;">I called it "Write the beginning last." Now, I'm calling it<span style="font-size: large;"> "<span style="font-size: large;">W</span>rite the story <span style="font-size: large;">in <span style="font-size: large;">pieces."</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">All along, I kn<span style="font-size: large;">ew the ogres w<span style="font-size: large;">ere going to end up with pies of some kind, but I wasn't sure how<span style="font-size: large;">. And I wasn't sure what the piemaker had done <span style="font-size: large;">to draw the attention of th<span style="font-size: large;">e ogres. All I knew was, the Ogre King was going to try a bunch of really stupid tr<span style="font-size: large;">icks and <span style="font-size: large;">traps to get the pie<span style="font-size: large;">maker to surrender pies. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">The firs<span style="font-size: large;">t<span style="font-size: large;"> scene t<span style="font-size: large;">hat came to mind<span style="font-size: large;">—the inspiration for the story, in<span style="font-size: large;"> fact—</span></span> was the huge ogre hiding behind a tree that was much too <span style="font-size: large;">small</span> to <span style="font-size: large;">hide him effectively, and a little girl wou<span style="font-size: large;">ld see him</span>. The girl would cal<span style="font-size: large;">l out<span style="font-size: large;">, "Grampa! The ogre<span style="font-size: large;">'s back!" And the ogre would panic, then<span style="font-size: large;"> think<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">:</span> Wait! May<span style="font-size: large;">b<span style="font-size: large;">e she means some <i>other</i> o<span style="font-size: large;">gre!</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">That was all I <span style="font-size: large;">had. So I<span style="font-size: large;"> t<span style="font-size: large;">yped it into a document called "Ogre and Pie<span style="font-size: large;"> M</span>a<span style="font-size: large;">n <span style="font-size: large;">story pieces<span style="font-size: large;">" and left it alone until I th<span style="font-size: large;">ought of another scene: a catapult that was too big to move through a tunnel it had to be moved through. I thought, wouldn't it be <span style="font-size: large;">funny if the Ogre King, who's not that bright himself, had to explain the <span style="font-size: large;">problem<span style="font-size: large;"> to an even dumber ogre? So I wrote a funny scene<span style="font-size: large;">, much of which ended up get<span style="font-size: large;">ting cut, as I discussed last time, b<span style="font-size: large;">ecause I decided the <span style="font-size: large;">Ogre King was<span style="font-size: large;">n't the right k<span style="font-size: large;">ind of dumb in it. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">I wrote a bunch of middle s<span style="font-size: large;">ections of this story, then I wrote the <span style="font-size: large;">beginning, then I wrote the ending. Then I went back and rewrote the <span style="font-size: large;">beginning from scratch because my first attempt <span style="font-size: large;">read like notes to myself about what the beginning had to do, as opposed to a real story beginning. Then I revised some middle p<span style="font-size: large;">ieces, got the ending in place, and <span style="font-size: large;">on my test reader's advice<span style="font-size: large;">, expanded a couple of <span style="font-size: large;">jokes into scenes of their own. Then I got down to <span style="font-size: large;">serious p<span style="font-size: large;">rose poli<span style="font-size: large;">shing<span style="font-size: large;">, readin<span style="font-size: large;">g the story aloud and revising any time I <span style="font-size: large;">found a sentence <span style="font-size: large;">that sound<span style="font-size: large;">ed clunky.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">The point is, I did not make any attempt to write a first draft begin<span style="font-size: large;">ning to m<span style="font-size: large;">iddle to end. I wrote <span style="font-size: large;">the parts I<span style="font-size: large;"> liked best, first. It doesn't matter that a cou<span style="font-size: large;">ple of those parts ended up being thrown out. That'll happen. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">So I'm calling this technique my "Jigsaw Puzzle" theory of story writing. First you write a bunch of separate pieces, then you work to connect them. Almost always, some of them won't fit. </span><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">But in the process of writing these scenes, you'll get a much better sense of what your story is about.<span style="font-size: large;"> During revision, I aim to <span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">connect the piece<span style="font-size: large;">s <span style="font-size: large;">so well that no one can tell <span style="font-size: large;">the story wasn't written<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">with the wh<span style="font-size: large;">ol<span style="font-size: large;">e story in <span style="font-size: large;">mind<span style="font-size: large;"> from the start.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">T<span style="font-size: large;">he a<span style="font-size: large;">lterna<span style="font-size: large;">tive method<span style="font-size: large;">, <span style="font-size: large;">writing a complete draft<span style="font-size: large;"> beginning to end, makes me spend a lot more time getting stuck. I thi<span style="font-size: large;">nk of a </span>good begin<span style="font-size: large;">ni<span style="font-size: large;">ng, but not a good second scene, even though I know the fourth scene by heart because I<span style="font-size: large;">'ve imag<span style="font-size: large;">ined it so many times. But I won't write the fourth sce<span style="font-size: large;">ne until I get the second and third.</span> No more! Now I write the parts I know and build around them. <span style="font-size: large;">For me, that's <span style="font-size: large;">so much faster, I can't beli<span style="font-size: large;">eve I used to think you had to write stor<span style="font-size: large;">ies any <span style="font-size: large;">other way.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">Do any of you write that way? How does it work for you? If you don't write this way, what <i>does</i> work for you? </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-23971636899739407042012-10-14T07:38:00.000-04:002012-10-14T07:38:10.437-04:00Revising Myself<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">Many of you probably know I have <a href="http://www.ufopub.com/2012/09/29/the-ogre-king-and-the-piemaker-by-tarl-kudrick/">a new story out</a>, because I used it as one of the two "Other Fiction" pieces for the October newsletter. I want to show you parts of some early drafts of the story. I like seeing how other writers think when they're working out ideas in early drafts, and I hope you do too.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">Here's an excerpt from the published version. Grunthos is king of the Ogres and Four-Toes is another ogre. Grunthos is explaining how he's going to get humans to give them pies.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace; font-size: large;">“We need to show humans that ogres work together and be scary force for evil,” Grunthos said. “Then humans give us anything we want.”</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace; font-size: large;">“Like rabbits?” Four-Toes said.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace; font-size: large;">“Sure,” Grunthos said. “But more about pies. We make them cook pies all day.”</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Grunthos is the smartest ogre, and he's not all that smart. When I first wrote this scene, though, I wasn't sure just <i>how</i> not-all-that-smart he was. I had him talking in much less broken English. Below, I underline parts of the dialogue that are different in the first draft.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace; font-size: large;">“We need to show humans that ogres <u>can</u> work together and be <u>a</u> scary force for evil,” Grunthos said. “Then <u>they’ll</u> give us anything we want <u>and we’ll be rich</u>.”</span><br />
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</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace; font-size: large;">“Like rabbits?” one of the ogres said.</span><br />
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</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace; font-size: large;">“Sure,” Grunthos said. “But <u>especially</u> pies. <u>We’ll</u> make them <u>cook all</u> day.”</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">As you can see, the original dialogue is more complex. It has a more advanced vocabulary and better grammar. But the subtlest differen<span style="font-size: large;">c<span style="font-size: large;">e</span></span> is, to me, a key to how my understanding of the Ogre King changed as I revised the story. In the published version, he says humans will be forced to "cook pies" all day. In the original, he just says "cook." </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I think adding "pies" changes a lot. First, the audience already know<span style="font-size: large;">s</span>, by this point in the story, that he's after pies. Grunthos explains it again anyway because he's really excited by his plan, and because he senses the other ogres might not understand him completely. He's smart enough to know he's smarter than the other ogres, and smart enough to adjust his dialogue for them, yet he's still dumb enough to come up with ridiculously stupid plans without realizing how bad the plans are. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But more than that, it doesn't sound so weird to say humans will be forced to "cook" all day. It does sound weird, at least to my ears, to say humans will "cook pies" all day. No native English speaker would talk about "cooking" a pie; you "bake" pies. Having Grunthos say "cook pies" makes Grunthos seem that much more like someone who doesn't really know what he's talking about.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Here's another example of how Grunth<span style="font-size: large;">os change<span style="font-size: large;">d<span style="font-size: large;"> durin<span style="font-size: large;">g revision.</span></span></span></span></span> Below is a piece of the original draft I<span style="font-size: large;"> deleted</span> in <span style="font-size: large;">the third dr<span style="font-size: large;">aft (out of six)</span></span>. It takes place during the scene when Four-Toes is building a catapult for the Ogre King. Four-Toes has built a catapult that is too large to move through a critical cavern in their mountain. In this scene, Grunthos is trying to get Four-Toes to realize the passageway is too small for the catapult.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Four-Toes led Grunthos [through the passageway]. “Be careful here,” Four-Toes said at the entranceway’s tightest part. “It’s tight.”</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">“I know,” Grunthos said, waiting for Four-Toes to put two and two together and come up with the correct half of his own name.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I love that line about coming up with his own name. But I had to cut it because I decided Grunthos isn't smart enough to have a thought quite that complex. In fact, I'm not sure Grunthos even knows that two plus two is four. </span></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Also, in <span style="font-size: large;">this <span style="font-size: large;">deleted scene,<span style="font-size: large;"> Gru<span style="font-size: large;">nthos seems much smarter than Four-<span style="font-size: large;">Toes, and I didn't<span style="font-size: large;"> want the gap between them to be that large</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>. So as much as I liked that joke, once I developed Grunthos more, it had to go.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Next week I'll talk about how, for once, I used my own advice about short story writing to write this story in much less time than I usually need. I'm now absolutely sold on this technique and I'm not sure I'll ever write a short story without it. Here's a hint: I called my first draft "O<span style="font-size: large;">gre and Pie Man <span style="font-size: large;">stor<span style="font-size: large;">y pieces</span></span></span>."</span> </span></span><br />
<br />Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-3506038741554600002012-09-30T08:12:00.001-04:002012-09-30T08:12:23.685-04:00The Most Annoying Syntax Error<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">It looks like Blogger is back up and running correctly! At least for me. We'll see how long it lasts.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I know a couple other editors read this blog, so I'm asking you, as well as anyone else with an opinion: Does the following syntax error bother you as much as it does me?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"Thank you." She said.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Of course, that text should be:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">"Thank you," she said.</span> </span> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Dialogue with improper grammar—specifically, <i>that</i> improper grammar—is one of the most frequent errors I see in OTP submissions. It's happening so often, I can think of only two plausible causes:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">1) An entire generation of writers has grown up learning how to use grammar correctly in other situations, but not dialogue. Quite often, that mistake is the only one I see in a well-written story, yet it happens multiple times in that story, as if the author learned different rules than I did. (It happens in poorly written stories too, but so do a dozen other kinds of errors, so I doubt the causes are the same in that case.)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">2) Microsoft Word and other word processors are applying grammar rules of normal writing to dialogue. The stupid programs keep saying "a sentence can't end in a comma," and following that up with "the first word in the next sentence needs to be capitalized." </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">What frustrates me is, I don't know how severely I should punish authors for this mistake. What if the last thing an author does before submitting a story is run "one last" spell and grammar check, and has the program set to fix errors automatically, and doesn't notice what the program is doing to dialogue? In that case, a good <i>writer</i> is being a bad <i>software user</i>, and those are different skills. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">True, for the last 20 years or so, all good writers had to learn to be good users of word processors, but this particular grammar "fix" seems to be a fairly recent development. And I've learned that even in 2012, a number of very good writers don't know crap about computers, word processors, or anything IT-related. Not even when they're younger than word processing itself (which floors me, but it's true--today's 20-somethings are NOT all skilled computer users, even though they grew up with computers even more than I did).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There's going to come a time when not knowing how to take full advantage of a word processing program's features will be as inexcusable as not knowing </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">"Thank you," she said.</span> </span> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">is correct dialogue grammar. But until that day arrives, I think I have to be a bit lenient with this particular error.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">What do you think? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-65701334751179165672012-09-15T19:24:00.000-04:002012-09-15T19:24:46.348-04:00OTP Recognized by the Million Writers Awards<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The Million Writers Awards came out, and after the main winners were announced, the list of notable stories of 2011 <a href="http://www.storysouth.com/millionwriters/millionwritersnotable_2011.html">was published here</a>. And guess what. All three of the stories I submitted for consideration--the first place winners in short story contests #13, #14, and #15--were considered among "the best online short stories published during 2011." (The magazines are listed in alphabetical order, so OTP is a way down the page.)</span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Every on-line magazine is allowed to nominate three stories for consideration. As you scroll down the page, note how most of the magazines have only one or two stories listed. (And of course many magazines had no stories considered among 2011's best, but those aren't visible on the list.)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">But OTP? We've got three. <i>All three</i> of the stories I nominated were picked by judges I've never met as among 2011's best online stories. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">So, congratulations to the authors: C. R. Hodges, Ken Liu, and Rachel Verkade. But if I may be so bold, congratulations to <i>us</i> at OTP for providing a place where such good fiction can flourish.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I just have to wonder: if we were allowed to nominate more than three stories, would more than three stories have made the list?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-9781793089181833062012-08-26T11:41:00.001-04:002012-08-26T11:41:24.527-04:00Fan Fiction, part 3<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Last week I talked about how I overcame my distrust and dislike of fan fiction enough to recommend writing it as a good exercise for beginning writers. The argument was, much of what beginning writers struggle with--character, worldbuilding, and so forth--are done for you. You can think about character and setting without having to <i>invent</i> character and setting.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">One problem writing fan fiction does <i>not</i> solve is poor pacing. In fact, terribly slow pacing is one of the biggest problems I've seen in the fan fiction I've read. It seems like the writers love these characters so much, they'll draw out every scene as long as they can, and have long dialogues that do nothing useful from a story perspective.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">So how can fan fiction help a beginning writer learn pacing? By modifying the concept a bit. Instead of writing a <i>new</i> adventure featuring your favorite characters, why not turn an existing story into prose?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Try this sometime. Take an episode of your favorite TV show, or a portion of your favorite movie, and turn it, scene for scene, line for line, into prose. Write down all the dialogue exactly. Describe what the characters are doing exactly. All you're changing is the storytelling medium.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Of course, that's a huge change, because TV is visual and auditory. We've all heard the saying that a picture is worth a thousand words. Well, let me tell you, if you're taking a 24-frames-a-second movie and turning each frame into 1,000 words, you're going to need 24,000 words to describe EVERY SECOND of the original. And that's just wrong.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Filmed stories give you a ton of details that don't matter all that much because the camera can't fail to record anything in its field of vision. If Buffy the Vampire Slayer enters a living room, you'll see the exact color of all her clothing and whatever else she's wearing. You'll see the carpet, the drapes, the size and color and position of the couch, whether the living room has one or several lamps, which lamps are on, how bright they are, what their shades look like, whether there are bookshelves, how many books are on each shelf... and all that information is present immediately. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Do you have to describe all that in your prose version? No, but I've seen people try. And their stories are harder to get through than root canals. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Here's a piece of advice I've been giving for several years now, and I keep giving it because a few beginners have told me it's some of the best advice they've ever received. Here it is:</span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;">Write what matters, not what happens.</span></i><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">When Buffy enters the room, don't bother telling us whether her left foot or her right foot stepped on the rug first unless that information matters to the story. In a TV episode, you can't help seeing which foot hits the floor first when she enters, if the camera shows her legs as she's walking. That information doesn't matter, but it takes no time to show that extra information, so letting the camera record it doesn't slow the story down. In prose, every word takes time to read. Don't make readers waste time reading whether her left foot or right foot hit the floor first unless it matters.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">So does any detail matter about how Buffy enters the room? Maybe. What's her mood like? Is she cautious or is she racing into the room? Is she saying anything as she enters? Sometimes these details add more to a story than the time to read them takes away, and sometimes they don't. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Turning a comic book, TV episode, movie scene, or play scene into prose is a terrific exercise for a beginning writer because it forces them to examine every piece of information in the original source, and ask whether it matters to the story's purpose. If it does, you find a way to describe it or evoke it in prose. If it does not, then you leave it out. Learning to leave out story elements that don't matter to the story is the single most valuable technique for improving a story's pacing in <i>any</i> medium.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Go back to the idea of the bookshelves Buffy's walking past in my earlier example. They're filled with books, right? So, do you think the show's writer and director said, "Make sure the first book on the first shelf is slightly taller than the second, but slightly thinner than the third, and a bit darker in color than the fourth..." No. The writer or director said, "There are old, well-bound, dusty books on the shelves. The books look expensive, maybe even historic, but they haven't been read in a while." That's the information the set designers had to work with, and that's the information that might go into your prose... if the bookshelves can play an important role in the story, such as setting a mood, or relating to a key plot point.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">No matter how experienced a writer you are, if you've never tried to write a prose version of a non-prose story, you've missed out on a great writing exercise. I strongly recommend it to anyone with fewer than five short story sales to their credit, and frankly, it's don't think it's a complete waste of time unless your fiction is winning literary prizes. </span></div>
Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-25034802107791387652012-08-19T10:21:00.001-04:002012-08-19T10:21:32.410-04:00Fan Fiction, part 2<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Last week, I talked about my personal, and to some degree irrational, bias against fan fiction. I don't like having irrational biases, so I've worked on finding positive uses for fan fiction. I've concluded that beginning writers may want to start writing fan fiction, on the condition that these writers are serious about improving their fiction skills. I can also say I don't remember ever hearing or reading any writing instructor suggest using fan fiction in the way I'm about to, so as far as I can tell, my advice here is original.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">A beginning writer attempting a complex story--especially a story set in any world that is not pretty much the same one the reader lives in--has a lot of work to do. The world has to be introduced, characters have to be introduced, some kind of problem has to be introduced... it's a lot to grasp for someone just starting out. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Fan fiction does a lot of the work for you. Let's say you're going to write a fanfic episode of the now-finished TV show <i>Eureka</i> from the Sci-Fi channel. (Oops, I mean "SyFy" channel--don't get me started.) Your setting is pre-made: a town full of genius scientists, most of whom are weird in some way. Your characters are set and you've got a broad range to choose from. Your plot is half-set; virtually every Eureka episode is about Sheriff Carter and his allies trying to solve a mystery caused by one or more crazy experiments that have gone wrong. And best of all, since fan fiction is written by <i>and for</i> fans of an existing fictional world, all your readers will already know this world, these characters, and this kind of plot. So look at all the work you will <i>not</i> have to do! You don't even have to describe what these people look like, if you don't want to. Your readers already know. All you have to focus on is your story, which is the fun part.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">And yet...</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">If you take this exercise seriously, and show your fanfic to cooperative fans of the show, then readers will complain if your version of the show's characters don't act right. If you get basic facts wrong, you'd better be clear you're writing some kind of alternative version of the show or you'll get negative reactions, too.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Fan fiction, when taken seriously, forces writers to think about their characters and the story's world. You have to constantly ask questions like, "How would Sheriff Carter react if...", and "Does that really sound like a line of dialogue Jo Lupo would say, especially that early in the morning?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">Nor can you ignore tone. Does your <i>Eureka </i>episode read more like an episode of <i>The X-Files</i>? <i>Eureka</i> isn't that creepy/paranoid/dark. Does it read like <i>Law & Order</i>? Now you're being too procedural and probably not weird enough.</span><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
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<span style="font-size: large;">Fan fiction can be a great exercise for writers who struggle with worldbuilding, character development, getting different characters' dialogue to sound different, and tone. And probably some other things.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">On the other hand, it won't help with pacing, an area where most fan fiction is especially dreadful. The fanfic I've forced my way through generally wastes page after page describing events and scenes of no importance to the story. If you're on page 20 of your <i>Eureka</i> story and nothing strange has happened yet, you're doing it wrong. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Next week, I'll tell you how I think fan fiction can help you improve your pacing. But for now, have fun with <a href="http://www.cracked.com/article_16554_the-5-most-baffling-sex-scenes-in-history-fanfiction.html">this link</a>, in which Kate Lawrence pokes fun at some of the worst excesses of fan fiction's fringes. (You'll need to scroll down a bit; there are ads at top.) Articles like hers make me feel my irrational dislike of fan fiction might not be quite so irrational after all.</span></div>
Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-10756288163382103442012-08-12T09:22:00.002-04:002012-08-12T09:22:33.654-04:00Fan Fiction, part 1<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">For a long time, I've held such a strong bias against fan fiction that I've felt it had to be irrational. Fan fiction has never done me any harm, so why does it make me cringe? Because so much of it is wall-to-wall bad writing? Sure, that's part of it, but there's more. So first, I'll explain my personal bias against fan fiction, then I'll show how I've come to appreciate fan fiction as a great tool for learning how to write better. (Seriously.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">FanFiction.net holds, thoroughly classifies, and cross-indexes over four million pieces of fan fiction, nearly none of which would qualify as well-written enough for <i>On The Premises</i> even if we accepted fan fiction, which we don't. (The exact number of stories is difficult to determine; see <a href="http://ffnresearch.blogspot.ca/2010/07/fanfictionnet-story-totals.html">this article</a> if you're interested.) And that site holds only the fan fiction that would be rated "R" or less if it were a movie. I can't figure out how to estimate the number of X-rated fan fiction pieces there are on the Web, but I'd be willing to be there's at least one X-rated piece for every piece that isn't. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">I've started reading a few of these stories. Generally I get about three sentences into them before the editor in me cringes.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">That's a reason to dislike individual <i>pieces</i> of fan fiction, but a terrible reason to dislike fan fiction itself. That's like saying all TV is garbage because you were repelled by one episode of one show. Fan fiction is a medium unto itself and to say "I don't like fan fiction" is like saying "I don't like novels" or "I don't like jazz." Surely there's <i>some</i> example of the medium I'd like?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Well, sure. Good writers trying hard to write well and choosing to use pre-existing characters in a pre-existing fictional world can produce stories I admire. I've seen a few. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">My problem with fan fiction is that virtually none of it is written by anybody who cares whether they're writing well. And that's okay if you're a young enough writer. Nobody expects a 12-year-old to produce literature. (Though I remember being a 12-year-old who thought, at the time, he was trying his hardest to produce literature, but that's another story). I do, however, expect people to want to improve, and to understate things, I get the sense that "learning how to write better" is not the point of most fan fiction. (cough wish fulfillment cough)</span></span><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
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<span style="font-size: large;">I used to be a serious jazz saxophonist, which means at one point I was a total beginner. I remember thinking even as a little kid in fifth-grade band that it was silly for adults to come listen to me and my bandmates play in our first ever live performance, because by any objective standard we were terrible. In other words, even back then, I was embarrassed at my lack of skill. Years later, I felt a lot better about playing for audiences when I knew I could produce music that adults didn't have to make apologies for. ("They're just kids! Clap, dear.")</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">(That raises a separate point--it's very hard for many adults to learn how to do anything complex well, like writing or playing a musical instrument or a speaking a foreign language. Adults are used to being pretty good at most things and it's embarrassing to realize that you may be 50 years old but when it comes to the guitar, you may as well be six, you're so bad at it. You have to put your pride aside and be willing to be very bad for a long time, or you'll never be very good. Many adults get embarrassed and quit, rather than struggle through the "I suck at this" phase. Which is a shame.)</span></span><div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
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<span style="font-size: large;">Anyway, the point is, I've always demanded high quality output from myself and it grates on my nerves that so many fan fiction writers don't. They don't care, their (quite small) audience doesn't care... it bugs me. At least when I was a terrible writer, at some level, I knew I was terrible and <i>I wanted to get better</i>. Everybody starts out terrible, but no one has to stay that way, and I have issues with people who are proud to stay that way. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">But that's my problem, not theirs. Furthermore, I've come to believe that fan fiction can be a tremendous tool for teaching those serious few how to improve their writing skills, because in fan fiction, a lot of what's hardest about writing fiction is done for you. That'll be the subject of the next couple of posts. In the meantime, I welcome feedback from people who are true fans of even the worst-written fan fiction, because I enjoy hearing from smart people who disagree with me.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-30726784681257918902012-07-29T09:45:00.003-04:002012-07-29T09:45:49.308-04:00A Tough Editing Decision<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">The most recent issue of <i>One Story</i> magazine (issue #166) showcases the story <i>World's End</i> by Clare Beams. Below are two versions of a short excerpt from the story. One version is exactly as it is published. The other version, I've altered. I'm wondering if you can guess which one is the version actually published.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">To set the scene, Robert Cale, a wealthy businessman, is talking to an architect he's hired and is meeting for the first time.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">Version one:</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">"What I want to do is put up houses. Sell them. People said I should talk to somebody before I bring in the builders, so we put everything in the right place. You're younger than I thought."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">Version two:</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">"What I want
to do is put up houses. Sell them. People said I should talk to
somebody before I bring in the builders, so we put everything in the
right place." Then, with no audible pause, "You're younger than I thought."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">I'm assuming Clare Beams (or her editor) recognized both versions were possible, and I'd guess Clare (or her editor) thought long and hard about which version was preferable. The second version <i>tells</i> you that there's "no...pause" between two sentences, but by adding the words that tell you there's no pause, the story pauses. I see a conflict between what the text says and what the story does.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">If you don't believe me, then try this third version, which I definitely made up:</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">"...so we put everything in the right place." Then, he didn't pause at all, he just went right on talking with no hesitation, no delay, no amount of time spent being silent between words... nope, he just went on to his next sentence and you couldn't have blinked twice in the time between his previous and his next sentence: "You're younger than I thought."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">You see the problem.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">I also wonder about the word "audible" in "no audible pause." Why not just "Then, with no pause..."? A pause in dialogue can be only heard. It can't be smelled or seen or tasted. Imagine the author writing "Then, with no smellable pause..." Ridiculous. So I wonder if "no audible pause" in this case contains a redundancy.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">By now you've probably guessed that version two, with the spelled-out lack of an audible pause, is the one the author or editor chose. I wish I knew why. The only argument for it I can think of is to prepare the reader for a change in the subject of Robert's dialogue. It's a sudden change. Version one above might surprise readers enough that they'd have to re-read that bit. So I can see the need for something to mark the transition. But why "Then, with no audible pause..."? Why not "Then he changed the subject." or "His eyes narrowed as he added," or something much better written than either of these suggestions? There has to be a better "beat" available than one that blatantly contradicts itself, especially since self-contradiction plays no role in the story, thematically or otherwise.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: large;">See what happens when you take editing seriously? I can't just read stories anymore, I have to play around with the parts that bug me.</span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-79376614675154238042012-07-22T12:59:00.000-04:002012-07-22T12:59:22.896-04:00Sometimes We Really Can Help Other Writers<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Not so long ago, I critiqued a contest entry called "A Trip to America" that didn't make the final judging round of our contest. We liked the story and thought it had good potential. We also pointed out some specific areas where we didn't think it worked as well as it could have, and made suggestions about how to strengthen it.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The author just emailed us to say that he rewrote the story, at least partially based on our critique, and now it's published in a magazine called <i>Litro</i>. That makes somewhere around five to seven stories that our critiques have helped get published in other magazines. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I'm proud to show off "<a href="http://www.litro.co.uk/?p=20157">A Trip to America</a>" by Tony Concannon. I hope you like it as much as we do. Congratulations, Tony!</span></span><br />
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<br />Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-2093672057353321182012-07-15T10:11:00.002-04:002012-07-15T10:11:34.795-04:00Why Fiction Based on Real Life Often Fails<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Since late 2009, we've sent out over 130 paid critiques of rejected stories, and only two have generated what I'd call unhappy responses. In both cases, the authors felt I'd either missed or misinterpreted critical information in the story. And in both cases, the stories were based on real life to such a degree that I'm not sure either contest entry qualifies as fiction. I don't think it's a coincidence that my most negative reactions came from critiques of stories based on real life.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">For one thing, it must feel kind of insulting to be told we don't believe your story <i>that really happened</i>. There's no solution to that problem, though, because <i>On The Premises</i> is a fiction magazine that emphasizes creativity, so we're going to keep assuming that the stories we receive are at least 90% made up. (If you want to write about your real thoughts and feelings, then give your real thoughts and feelings to made up characters and put them in made up situations that would evoke your real thoughts and feelings.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">To show why stories based on real life can often fail, I'll transcribe a conversation between me and an imaginary author who wrote an imaginary story called "Sister From Hell." (We have never received any story with that title, or any story similar to the one I'm about to describe.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">ME: ...so to summarize, we didn't believe the extreme behavior change shown by the narrator's sister at the end of the story. Since the whole story hinges on that change in behavior, it's fair to say we didn't believe the whole story, and that's why "Sister From Hell" didn't make the final round of judging.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">AUTHOR: Well of course you didn't believe it. She fools everybody.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">ME: ?????</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">AUTHOR: The story's based on my real sister, who fools everybody into thinking she's the nicest person in the world, then stabs you in the back.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">ME: Okay, but we're talking about the narrator's sister in "Sister From Hell."</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">AUTHOR: I'm the narrator! I'm writing about me and my sister.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">ME: First, if we'd known the story was non-fiction, we'd have disqualified it from our contest. Second, we're not concerned with your real sister here, we're concerned with the character as described in "Sister From Hell."</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">AUTHOR: I just told you they're the same thing.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">ME: Look, you have a great deal of personal history with your real sister. How did you learn she's lying when she's acting all nice to everybody?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">AUTHOR: [Gives many long, detailed examples of sister's deceitful behavior, and the clues the author discovered that proved the sister was lying.]</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">ME: Great. The problem is, none of that information appears in the current draft of "Sister From Hell." The story we received spends ten pages showing the narrator's sister performing such selfless, kind acts that we were ready to nominate her for sainthood. Then on page eleven she burns down an orphanage and laughs at all the dying children. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">AUTHOR: Okay that never really happened, but it's the kind of thing she'd do if she could get away with it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">ME: My point is, there's nothing IN THE STORY to make us believe she's anything except what she appears to be: nice, sweet, etc. Not until she burns down an orphanage. To us readers, that act came out of nowhere. I think the real problem here is, you know your material so well, you forgot that we DON'T already know it. If we knew all along your sister was a psychopath, "Sister From Hell" would probably have worked better for us. Since we didn't know that, the last part made no sense to us.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">AUTHOR: My gosh, you're right! [Author goes on to write best-selling novels, win a Pulitzer Prize, and publicly credit me as a mentor, thus helping me teach creative writing somewhere. Like I said, the author's imaginary.]</span></div>
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<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">I think the biggest problem with the advice to "Write What You Know" is, it's too easy to forget your readers don't also know it. If you write what you make up, you'll ask important questions about your characters, plot, and story's world because you probably don't know the answers to those questions either. As you develop the answers to those questions, many of them will appear in your story, probably because that's <i>how</i> you're coming up with the answers. If you already have all the answers, you might leave out something your readers will need to know.</span></div>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-83411846238259084822012-07-08T10:58:00.004-04:002013-04-07T10:00:38.585-04:00Sentences Within Sentences<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">With the publication of Issue #17, the OTP blog returns!</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">A writing technique I've seen few authors get away with is the placement of complete sentences within other complete sentences. Below is what I consider a particularly<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: large;">telling </span></span>example of what can go wrong when you tr<span style="font-size: large;">y to put too much information <span style="font-size: large;">into one sentence</span></span>.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The quote comes from <i>Statistical and Machine-Learning Data Mining: Techniques for Better Predictive Modeling and Analysis of Big Data, Second Edition</i>, by Bruce Ratner.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">(Don't worry if you don't fully understand the technical content. Just examine it as <span style="font-size: large;">one</span> huge sentence. And it's a real shame this sentence had the <span style="font-size: large;">same ef<span style="font-size: large;">fect on my reading that a speed bump ha<span style="font-size: large;">s on my driving, because for the most part, <span style="font-size: large;">I though<span style="font-size: large;">t Rat<span style="font-size: large;">ner's book was well do<span style="font-size: large;">ne<span style="font-size: large;">. In fact<span style="font-size: large;">, his explanation of CHAID and related techn<span style="font-size: large;">i<span style="font-size: large;">ques is <span style="font-size: large;">the best I've <span style="font-size: large;">read to date. <span style="font-size: large;">All that aside, <span style="font-size: large;">I wish someone ha<span style="font-size: large;">d revised this next bit b<span style="font-size: large;">efore it went to print:</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>) <br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">CHAID is a popular technique, especially among wannabe regression modelers with no significant statistical training because (1) CHAID regression tree models are easy to build, understand, and implement; and (2) CHAID underpinnings are quite attractive: CHAID is an assumption-free method, meaning there are no formal theoretical assumptions to meet (traditional regression models are assumption full, which makes them susceptible to risky results).</span></span> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">That was published as one sentence! I count five distinct sentences in all that text. Here's how I'd rewrite it. For clarity, I put a number in brackets in front of each separate sentence.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">[1] CHAID
is a popular technique, especially among wannabe regression modelers
with no significant statistical training. [2] First, CHAID regression
tree models are easy to build, understand, and implement. [3] Second, CHAID
underpinnings are quite attractive. [4] It's an assumption-free method,
meaning there are no formal theoretical assumptions to meet. [5] (Traditional
regression models are full of assumptions, which makes them susceptible to
risky results.)</span></span></span></span><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I see such beyond-run-on-sentences quite frequently, e<span style="font-size: large;">specially in tech<span style="font-size: large;">nical and academic writing aimed at <span style="font-size: large;">audiences with a specific ed<span style="font-size: large;">ucati<span style="font-size: large;">onal background<span style="font-size: large;">. I know it's easy to get car<span style="font-size: large;">ried away with long sentences; I do it myself. When revising, examine those long sentences carefully and ask yourself if spl<span style="font-size: large;">itting them into sh<span style="font-size: large;">orter sentences would work better.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">(As a real example, I considered removing the semi-colon in the "I know it's easy..." sentence. After some thought, I decided "I do it myself" is attached enough to the prior idea that the semi-colon works. However, the prior two sentences were originally one long one. Yes, that's right, I violated the very rule I'm talking about while drafting an example of not violating the rule. That's how ingrained long sentences are in me! Sad, isn't it?)</span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-49378998249888338942012-06-23T14:39:00.001-04:002012-06-23T14:39:17.572-04:00In Case It's Not Obvious...<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Hey everyone. In case it's not obvious, the OTP blog is not updated between contests. Editing the stories and preparing the magazine takes up all our OTP time during those months. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I should have said something about that earlier for my ten million* fans. Sorry about that.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">*Count is accurate to within plus or minus ten million</span> </span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-42733731946520970612012-05-27T10:46:00.000-04:002012-05-27T10:46:10.874-04:00Having My Own Work Edited, Part 4 of 4<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Finally, I'll talk about specific edits that were made to the draft of "Fourth Wish" I sent Cliffhanger Books. Underlined parts show what changed.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Original: "the imps had attempted to put on five different plays since <u>going to</u> the human world"</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Revision: "the imps had attempted to put on five different plays since <u>returning from</u> the human world"</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Why the change? I wasn't sure at first, since the imps did in fact go to, and return from, the human world. But they spent just enough time there that I figure the editors wanted to make clear what time frame I really meant--the clock started ticking when they got back, not when they left. Honestly, I don't consider this edit worth making, but I also don't consider it worth arguing about. Part of taking a professional attitude towards writing is picking your battles carefully.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Original: "[Skragg] summoned a window into <u>the human world. Specifically,</u> Candace's home."</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Revision: "[Skragg] summoned a window into Candace's home."</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">This one made me say "Duh." The only time shorter is worse than longer is if every word in the longer version adds something meaningful to the reading experience. The underlined part adds nothing because we know Candace's home is in the human world. There is no such thing as a neutral word or phrase that has no effect on the reader. Every word, phrase, and sentence either makes your story stronger or weaker.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Original dialogue: "So when she turned twenty-one I said, sure, I'll be a <u>guardian, and I</u> had the house inspected and did all the lawyer things..."</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Revised dialogue: "So when she turned twenty-one I said, sure, I'll be a <u>guardian. I</u> had the house inspected and did all the lawyer things..."</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Candace is under significant stress as she's talking. In my original, she's rambling with long run-on sentences. As usual, I spoke all the dialogue aloud and acted it out in the way I imagined Candace would say it</span><span style="font-size: large;"> before sending my story to the editors</span><span style="font-size: large;">. I'd gotten locked into a way of seeing this scene. The simple edit Kevin and Karen came up with (this one was Karen's) changed my view of how Candace was saying her lines. Now when I act out her lines, I think her dialogue sounds more believable. Why? Because it takes me less effort to say it. I don't need to take such a long breath because her sentences are shorter.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">So writers: try speaking your dialogue in more than one way before sending that story out! Try putting pauses in weird places, just to see if you stumble into a pattern that sounds better than your original. It really works.</span></div>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-30969987539413281012012-05-20T15:32:00.002-04:002012-05-27T10:52:29.377-04:00Having My Own Work Edited, Part 3 of 4<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Now that I've covered the high-level changes I made to a story I recently sold, I'll go into some of the embarrassing line edits the editors suggested or made. I say "embarrassing" because while some edits were of the "personal taste" variety (like suggesting two short paragraphs should be combined), others are better labeled as "Tarl, you should know better than to submit prose this clumsy."</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Here are two writing faults that appeared several times in the story I submitted. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">First, I use "that" too often. Several times sentences such as "She knew that genies normally didn't..." got edited to "She knew genies normally didn't..." and I agree with 100% of those changes. Sometimes I think I have a "that" key on my keyboard and just enough obsessive compulsive disorder to feel great stress if I don't press it at least once a paragraph. I catch most of them in my own rewrites, but not all. </span></div>
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<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Solution: From now on I'll use the search function to find every "that" in the whole document, and delete or rewrite the ones that serve no purpose. (There's one: "ones THAT serve no purpose." You might say that particular "that" is necessary, but I could have written, "and delete or rewrite the pointless ones," which I think is stronger. Even when "that" serves a real need, it's rarely the strongest way to say what you're trying to say.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Second, my readers are having more trouble than I'd expect understanding who says what line of dialogue, especially when three or more people might be speaking. (And I write a lot of group interaction scenes.) </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Solution: Change my strategy from "avoid dialogue markers unless absolutely necessary" to:</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">1) When two characters are conversing, use some kind of marker at least every fourth line.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">2) When three or more people are conversing, use some kind of marker every time it is not <i>painfully</i> obvious who is speaking.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">No matter how many people are engaged in the following example of a conversation, do you really need a marker for the second line of dialogue?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">J.D., Elliot, and Turk stood by as Dr. Cox asked Carla, "Dear GOD will you please stop making that noise?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">"What noise?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Since the second line is in direct response to the first, and the first addressed a specific person, readers can assume the second speaker is the one being addressed by the first. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Now consider this next example, which represents the kind of error I make all the time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">J.D., Elliot, and Turk stood by as Carla ran her fingernails down a blackboard. Dr. Cox asked, "Dear GOD what is that horrible noise?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">"What noise?"</span></div>
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<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">In my mind, Carla's speaking the second line, but it's at least theoretically possible someone else said it. Maybe everyone else is pretending not to hear it for some reason and Turk said it. Anyway, since Dr. Cox's question was asked to the group as a whole, readers can't assume Carla's responding. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Next time, I wrap up this little series of posts with more embarrassing line edits.</span></div>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-78763003849366983932012-05-13T11:05:00.000-04:002012-05-27T10:52:35.842-04:00Having My Own Work Edited, Part 2 of 4<div style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;">"The Fourth Wish" is a short story that's part of a connected series of stories. It's the second one to get accepted for publication and the fourth one to be written. Now that a second one has been accepted, I believe enough in the idea's commercial potential to commit to writing the rest of them and trying to sell them as a novel-in-stories. However, I don't think I'll try to sell any of the other stories as self-contained pieces of fiction, and this post is about my reasoning.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">These stories are about the world's last wish-granting genie and his human master, Candace. In this world a bond between genie and master is for life and the master gets one wish every ten years. Candace has her first wish at age six (that story is <a href="http://www.towndrunkmag.com/2007/kudrick_skragg.aspx">already published</a>). "The Fourth Wish" is set 30 years later.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">You see the problem. While the first story requires no background because the characters are new, "The Fourth Wish" carries ideas into it from the previous ones. Candace's prior wishes matter, because one of them has a substantial effect on her current life. Yet nothing would have killed this story faster than a flashback explaining the previous stories. So what could I do?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">My answer was to pretend, to the greatest extent possible, that there are no other stories. When I couldn't avoid some bit of background, I presented it in a way that develops a central character. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Specifically, the genie hates being enslaved to a human, and the rules say he can be free of her if she wishes for something greedy enough—some kind of wish that would ruin her life if granted. In this internal monologue, we see how her refusal to abuse his power drives him crazy: </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">She’d wasted her first wish on ice cream. Her second was for help deciding what college to go to. Her third was for “enough” money. What kind of human wished for “enough” money? When was she going to get stupid like the rest of her kind? If he had to be chained to her for another fifty or sixty years…</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">In my view, the keys to this monologue are (1) it's in character for the genie to complain to himself, (2) it's short, and most importantly, (3) it appears at a point in the story where readers ought to be wondering what Candace's prior wishes were. So I'm not boring the readers with information <i>I</i> want them to know, I'm telling them information that (I hope) <i>they</i> want to know. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Still, I don't go on for long paragraphs, and I <i>do not</i> employ a flashback. I say it in as few words as I can, then get on with the story.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Finally, to make "The Fourth Wish" stand alone, I eliminated some critical facts about my fictional world and changed another. The change relates to the creatures called "imps." For Cliffhanger Books, I made the imps male instead of saying they're magical creatures that don't have, or require, gender. And I don't discuss why the genie calls himself the <i>last</i> wish-granting genie. Were there others? What happened to them? And why does the last genie live on a desolate plain with only three annoying imps for company? The novel-in-stories answers all of these questions. The stand-alone story treats them as facts, not questions: He's the last, he lives on a flat plain, and three imps live there too. And to make it possible to ignore those questions, I changed their answers. The "real" answers have implications that can't be ignored.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">That's why I don't think I'll try to sell more of these stories by themselves. I have to abandon too much material to make them work independently.</span></div>
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<br />Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-321311974284039882.post-75318928511067937962012-05-10T10:46:00.000-04:002012-05-27T10:52:42.536-04:00Having My Own Work Edited, Part 1 of 4<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I recently sold a story called "The Fourth Wish" to a paranormal romance anthology being published by <a href="http://www.cliffhangerbooks.com/">Cliffhanger Books</a>. I don't know much about paranormal romance. In fact, as much as the editors liked my story, my ignorance of the genre caused some problems, and they've asked me to change a few story elements to better fit what readers expect from such stories.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I have no problem making those kinds of changes. Why? Because even though the money I make from occasional short story sales is negligible, I pride myself on a professional attitude. My personal opinion of what "professional attitude" for writing means can be summed up in this pair of phrases:</span></span><i><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> </span></span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Amateurs write for themselves. Professionals write for the people who pay them.</span></span></i><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">If you're serious about having your work published by others, sold by others, and marketed by others, then I think you need to be serious about letting others have some say over what you write. I'm friends with a couple of people whose primary source of income is freelance writing. Do you know what those people write for a living? Whatever their paying audience tells them to, that's what.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Oh, they can reject assignments that go against their ethics or religion or something. They're freelance writers, not minions of some evil overlord. But if these people were asked to write 2,500 words about litter on the Atlantic City boardwalk in exchange for their going rate, they'd do it, even if they aren't all that personally interested in boardwalk litter. And if the editor read a draft and said "This is great, but can you focus more on the north end of the boardwalk?", they'd rewrite the article. They wouldn't go off on some bombastic tirade about artistic integrity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Now some people say writing fiction is like any other artist creating any other art: the artists have to follow their muses, the crowd be damned. That's fine, if you honestly don't care whether anyone ever sees your work. Me, I'd like people to read my stories. Otherwise I'd never send them to magazines. I'd just hide my stories under my bed and go around calling myself a writer, and I'd cough in embarrassment any time someone asked where they could read anything I'd written.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Because I want others to read my stories, I will accept help from people who know my intended audience better than I do. Kevin from Cliffhanger told me </span><i style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">even though it was perfectly in character</i><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"> for my sarcastic genie to use the word "retard," Cliffhanger's audience wouldn't like it. So, I changed the wording. Karen from Cliffhanger told me my story </span><i style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">worked fine as it was, but her readers would want the female in the romance to appear sooner</i><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">. So, I started revisions that introduced her in the first sentence.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">"The Fourth Wish" is part of a series of connected stories that I intend to sell as a novel when it's ready, and I might reverse a couple of Kevin's and Karen's suggested changes when that time comes. But for Cliffhanger Books, I'm trusting my editors and following their guidance because they know my audience better than I do, and because I want that audience to read my story and like it.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Next time: the challenge of taking a story that's part of a larger tale and making it stand on its own. </span></span>Tarl Kudrickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148307216903708071noreply@blogger.com0